I recently read an article that said you should wake your teenager up on the weekends and not let them sleep in. They thought it was teaching them how to be an adult, because successful adults don’t sleep in. Really?
Then it told you that you tell them to set their alarm, so that they can be responsible and get themselves up. What? That’s being responsible because you tell them to do it?
So what should you do for your sleeping teenager? Should you just let them sleep?
First I would suggest you as the parent do some work on yourself. You need to decide why you want your teen to get up earlier on the weekends.
Is it so you can feel like you are a good parent? Doing your job?
Maybe it’s because they are so much happier when they don’t sleep the day away?
Whatever your reason is just make sure you like it and it is not to make yourself feel better.
Then if you still want to not let your teen sleep in on the weekend talk to them about it and the reasons why.
Have a plan of what the consequence will be if they sleep past the time you feel they should be getting up. Say if you sleep past 11am on Saturdays then you will have extra chores. Or maybe you want to say if you want to sleep past 11am on Saturdays then these things need to be done prior and if they are not then this will happen.
That way your teen knows the expectation and the consequence and can make the decision themselves. They feel like they have some choice in the situation.
Oh one thing more. You need to allow them to choose and not get mad when they choose the consequence. Why you ask? Because we are teaching them how to be adults and they sometimes don’t make the best decisions and there are consequences. You need to be consistent.
When we allow our emotions to get involved when they don’t choose to do what we have asked, then we are trying to manipulate them with our emotions.
That is called emotional blackmail and it’s not a healthy way to manage our children.
This process can work with any request you have of your teen.
Personally I love it when my teens sleep in. My husband sleeps in a lot and he is a very successful adult.
One of my clients this week who is in my “Successful Teens Program” asked why they don’t teach these tools to kids starting in Grade 1? I have the same question.
Why are you waiting? Your teen needs to learn how to be successful, confident and how to navigate any relationship in their life. Why not set them up for success now?
I have one spot available right now in either my “Successful Teens Program” or my “Anxiety BackPack Program”. Don’t miss the opportunity for your teen or young adult to start learning these tools in 2020.